Monday, March 6, 2006

Mama Mia!

Due to my hubby's temperamental automobile, which I have inherited for the week, I stayed in the office for lunch. Something I loathe to do.

I brought a Lean Cuisne Four Cheese Lasagna - easy and fast. Or so I thought. I had wrapped it in Glad Press-n-Seal. And for those of you not familiar with the product it's basically fly paper in big clear sheets. I spent a good five minutes wrestling the plastic off of my dinner. Then, I opened it and slit the wrapper. So far so good.

I then removed the wrapped and placed a paper towel over the tray so as to not coat the inside of the microwave with tomato sauce. Due to past experiences with exploding marinara, one can't be too careful.

Waiting for the beep, I perused my new "Writer's Digest" magazine.. Oh - an article on how to make your dialogue more interesting and believable... oh... okay. Nope. I don't like that. Stupid Article-writer that makes more money than me...


I'm starved by this point but wait to "let dish cool in microwave for five minutes."

I wait and then poke my head in the microwave. One half is bubbling, the other half - frozen.

Damnit. And only 35 minutes left on lunch.

Six tries and two cheese-removal processes later, I am sitting down to eat my lunch. It smells okay. I dig in. The cheese oozes off my plastic fork and lands back in the paper tray. Hunger takes over my brain and I shove a large noodley bite in my tender, pink mouth.

And burn the hell out of it.

I then say words that should not be used in a professional office and down half my coke to put out the flames in my esophagus.

I refuse to be beaten by a common Frozen dinner. The battle of wills has begun, Me v. the Lasagna.

Stay tuned for tomorrow's deathmatch: Me v. Spaghetti.


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