People tell me too much, sometimes.
I blame the chubby face, the crooked smile, the warm and caring look in my eyes (which is actually just my contact lenses reflecting in the sun, but, whatever...) and the fact that I never seem to be mad. I'm always smiling. I blame my mother for my damn sunny outlook on life. "Holly, you may have one gimpy leg - but so what? Live with it!" And if that isn't the best advice that a mom can give to her recently diagnosed disease-riddled child - well - I don't know what is!
So - I get back from lunch yesterday and the phone rings - I answer it by correctly listing all the names on the wall and wait.
"Hey Holly. It's me." One of the secretaries. "I'm home and not feeling too good."
"Oh - I'm sorry to hear that," is my required response of human compassion.
"Yeah, I'm crampin' real bad and have been sittin' on the pot forever," she continues the tale of her tale, "Yeah, so, as soon as I can get done here doing my thing - I'll be in."
"Okay," I finally manage. "I'll let the office manager know."
Why do people tell me this? But the saga continues...
Later, in my night class I make a new friend who missed the last class due to "Diarhhea all day long. I was in the bathroom forever!"
Really, people, I think it's okay to skip out on a few details.
Until this is learned by the general population, though, I will continue to smile, nod and look sympathetic.
Until my head explodes.
5 comments:
Dear Holly,
Sometimes I wish I was born with 11 toes.
-Dan
I'm not sure exactly how I came across your journal...lol... but I love it! You have a great sense of humor and I love the way you write! I'll definitely be back :)
Erika
Holly,
Right now, I have a huge oozing sore on my ass.
Oh wait. That's my boss.
R-iii-iiiiing....
"Hey Holly. It's me. I'm home and not feeling too good. I think I shouldn't have let this syphilis go untreated. And these crabs are getting to be an edible size. And, hey, what do you know about herpes? Do you think this oozing sore on my privates could be a herpes thing? Could you come over after work so I can show it to you?"
"Hey, Bubba, c'mere and tell Holly about that THING you got on your Thing. It's okay, she's disease-riddled, too."
lol
tmi is def right
hope you have a good nigth
ttyl
<3, emily
Post a Comment