Hey I'm the guest editor's pick this week! Whoo hoo! Happy dance in my chair!
So - while I'm jigglin' like a bowl full-o-jelly on my tiny little computer chair - lemmie just share with you the events that transpired last night.
I had my gal's night - it was awesome and coined such phrases as "Don't put your tongue on that pie!" and "Would you like to Boba my Ganoosh?".
Classics, for sure.
Then, as my gal pals left, the menfolk started filling in. Fresh from a trip to Hooters, their pervy repitoire was fueled by skimpily clad waitresses and hot wings. I feared for my virgin ears (ha!) and decided to go to bed. Timidly poking my head into Harry's office/playroom I said "Hey - uh - I'm gonna go on to bed."
"Cookies?" Harry asked.
"What? No, I said I was going to bed."
"Will you make us some cookies."
And Lord help me if I didn't smile like Holly the Happy Homemaker and go upstairs to make Chocolate Chip Cookies. From Scratch.
I'm up to my elbows in sugar and flour when Harry comes in and skids across the white kitchen tiles. He grabs me and starts furiously unbuttoning my purple striped shirt.
"What the hell are you doing?" I'm laughing. I can't protect myself from the de-shirtenator due to my flour encrusted hands.
"My manhood has been challenged," he said and continued to unbutton me. "I have five minutes to have sex and get back downstairs."
"Five minutes, huh?" I looked at him and slapped at his head. "Nope. Go back downstairs before I hurt you."
He zoomed back down the stairs leaving me to finish baking with a gaping blouse.
Twenty minutes later - I deliver a batch of cookies to him and the boys camped out in the basement, each with new third hands that look like xbox controllers.
"Here ya go," I say.
"Thanks, Holly!" six voices say in unison.
Why do I suddenly feel like a mom?
"Honey?" Harry starts timidly. "I'm thirsty. Can you get me a soda?"
Resisting the urge to pelt hiim with the He-man Action figures to my right, I oblige.
I come back, deliver the sodas and shake my head as I leave.
As I retreat I hear: "Marriage is cool, huh?"
So - my job is done - for now...