Wednesday, May 31, 2006

Oh No, not LOWE'S!

Last night Harry and I ventured, once again, to the big land of home improvement  - Lowe's.  

I've heard that 70% of marriages that involve building a home end in divorce.  Makes me wonder how many couples navigating a home repair disaster end in - homicide!

"Holly!  HOLLY!" Harry has found something.  And from the urgency in his voice  - it's the home repair equivilant to the holy grail.  He drags me to a small stainless steel appliance.  He's beaming. I'm trying to figure out what the hell it is.

"It's an ICEMAKER," he says. 

"It's twelve-hundred dollars," I jab a nail-bitten finger at the large black and white sign. 

"Yeah, but it - makes ice."  He's so happy.  I hate to burst his bubble.  But I'm his wife and, heck, I'm pretty sure it's my job to kill his dreams - er- or something like that. 

"Honey, you want to replace our trash compactor with an ice maker even though our brand new fridge has filtered ice and water?"  I say it gently, thinking he'll get the point.

"Yes.  It fits perfectly."  Uh-oh.  I'm in trouble here.  Send in Nanny 911 - we're about to have a 26 year-old tantrum in aisle four...

"Why don't we just get a cabinet to go there... Maybe one with a filing system in it?"  I try to reason with him. 

It's no use.

His eyes are glazed over with thoughts of ice-filled beverages.

I've lost him.



dpoem said...

I'm weeping...  That was bloody hillarious.  

But, in Harry's defense, twelve-hundred bucks is quite a steal for an ice-maker.  hahaha...  


princesssaurora said...

It is your job to kill his dreams... and wait... it gets more fun...

be well,