Tuesday, December 6, 2005

Thought Balloons

More tidbits from the life of Hollyk:

1. I have decided, after much soul-serching and Graduate-catalog searching - that I'm destined to be a sub-par receptionist for the rest of my life. It's humiliating, it's degrading, it's my life.

2. Harry took his laundry to his granmother's house on Sunday night, around midnight. "Just do a couple of pairs of pants for me, and don't worry about the rest" he said as he gestured to the Polo and Abercrombie encrusted pile of garments in the kitchen floor. She heard "Please work your tiny fingers to the bone doing all this laundry - tonight. Now." She loves doing his laundry - it makes her feel useful. So, she happily sorted, washed, and ironed his clothes (he had to beg her to stop ironing his boxers).

She tripped.

She fell.

She fractured her shoulder.

She ended up in the hospital.


Now she is our own little personal couch hermit.

We're just glad she's okay! My sis said it best when she said "I think she just doesn't want ya'all to leave town! 'Take that!' and then she throws her self on the floor."!

Summer's funny.

3. To boot it all - I'm sick. I don't know how I picked up the crud - but I blame those inconsiderate people who come to work while sick just to infect us all. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go get a box of tissues out of the office closet...

4. Told my mother I was seeking graduate admissions to contine my Criminal Justice education in a Counseling field to help victims of crime after a violent act has occured. She freaked out. Literally.

"What if you told someone's girlfriend to break up with them and then that man comes and rapes and kills you!!! Huh?! What then?"

"Mom, that could've happened when I told people what coat to buy their husband. People are nuts everywhere."

"You'll get hurt."

"Yeah, 'cuz I'm so tiny and non-intimidating with my tiny self."

"Here," she says, thrusting a pamphlet at me. "Here, it's Interior Design at the community college."

Makes me feel like a made to order Happy Meal - would you like fries with that?

5. We put up the Christmas tree the other night. Other than the fact that the bottom half was strung with enough lights to sear one's corneas out (It's a hand-me-down tree from Meme - she could only reach the bottom half to add more lights) - it turned out pretty cute. At midnight we turned out the lights, left the tree on and watched "A Mickey's Christmas Carol." Harry insisted that I sit on his lap where I was properly cuddled like the baby I am.

6. I finally found something for Harry for Christmas. I hope it comes in this week! AND I hope he likes it - I'm no longer a bad wife!

7. Yesterday, part of my job duties included cleaning up after a meeting of partners. They left food everywhere, empty cans and napkins! And they didn't even leave me a tip! The nerve!

8. Woke up to find my right eye swollen and bumpy - figure that either Harry smacked me a good one while I slept, or that the drug cocktail I had before dinner had some consequences...

9. Craved oranges for two months, bought some, went to Columbus, 'rents stole 'em, bought some more, taste like crap. Geez.....

10. Have been burping and vurping up Crunch Berries all day. Think it's time to switch to Rice Krispies.


So, on this chilly day, those are my tidbits - oh - and before I forget - I got ANOTHER IM from the "how big are your boobies" guy - only this time - he wanted to talk about him. All 11.5 " of him. It's amazing how men look at centimeters and see inches.

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