Friday, November 4, 2005

The Pursuit of Lunch, Life, and Liberty


My blog is worth $0.00.
How much is your blog worth?

How funny is that?  My blog - IS WORTHLESS!

ahahahahaahahhaaaa!

So - lemmie just share with ya'all another WORTHLESS anticdote of my WORTHLESS life to put in my WORTHLESS blog (okay - really, I'll stop - no more pity parties - sniff sniff).

The state of West Virginia, land of the WORTHLESS-named states (no, really, I'm done, swear), requires that all vehicles be inspected on a yearly basis.  This will somehow ensure that the people of WV do not drive unsafe vehicles (my guess is that the ban is lifted in Lincoln County - those people drive Flinstone-esque trucks down the main highway!).  Great. Wonderful.  Whatever.

I go to Jiffy Lube.  "OUT OF STICKERS, PLEASE COME BACK."

I go to Firestone.  "Yeah, uh, we's outta people to put 'em on."  Yes. I was turned away for lack of "sticker-putter-on-ers."

I go to Sears.  "Uh, we don't do that 'till November."  "Um, it IS November."  "Not until LATER in November."  "Ohhhhh."  Clear as mud.

I go home and while driving home, try to come up with reasons why I haven't had my car inspected even though it ran out a little bit ago - AUGUST.

Today, I am running late for work, but still find the time to switch out my purse since carrying the same handbags two days in a row is, I'm sure, blasphemy in the Fashion World.  At lunch, I order my healthy meal at Wendy's drive thru:  a cheeseburger, fries and a frosty ( My DIEt up and died.  RIP.).  I look in my cute Ocelot purse - NOTHING.  Not a bit of cash or plastic in sight.

Luckily, I had grabbed my paycheck and my bank - on the other end of town - let me cash it. 

So, now - I'm driving around sans inspection and license.

Yeah baby.  I'm livin' dangerously.

(WORTHLESS!) 

1 comment:

tenyearnap said...

Can you believe that mine is "worth" $1693.62 even though you are a better writer than I am! Would you like to rent out space on my journal? ;-)