Monday, November 28, 2005

I'm Leaving (not) on a jet plane!!!!!

Lemmie just sum up my Thanksgiving Day Shopping Trip Extravaganza to New York City in one, all-encompassing word: CANCELLED.


You heard me.

Harry's grandmother fell ill and we just weren't comfortable leaving her for obvious (and a few not-so-obvious) reasons. So we hung around town for the duration of the Turkey-devouring holiday.

Harry felt bad, though, so he took me to Columbus for Black Friday. Here is a list of the happenings of that tumultuous day:

1. Harry goes into a gas station after filling up on $2.01/gallon gas (sweet, dude!) to get a couple of beverages. A few minutes later, he hops in the car, throws it in drive and speeds off - sans drinks. "What's up? Where's my Fanta?" He looks at me, eyes wide and then busts out laughing "Some woman just drove through the side of the building! Right through the glass! THEN she tried to back out like nothin' happened! The little guy back there - he barely spoke English and he's trying to get to her!" At this point he's laughing so hard that he's gone silent, body rocking with severe chuckles. "Soooooo - no drinks, then?" I ask.

2. I lost my brand new, only worn it twice Coach scarf somewhere between DSW and the Steak and Shake. I have to wonder if the half-white, half-dark chocolate milkshake with whipped cream, hot fudge and sprinkles was worth the price of the beautiful accessory. On second thought, yes, yes it was. Anyway, Harry bought me a new one when we got to the Jeffersonville outlets. Hee hee

3. We were trying to find Filene's Basement. A place known for their killer deals on designer duds. We drive past a rather large sporting goods store. "Wow, that's a big Dick's!" Harry exclaims. Stops. Realizes what he says and then laughs sheepishly. A new catch phrase was born.

4. We find our Holiday Pattern at the Pfalzgraf outlet. Holly loses all self-control. We have to leave our driver's license with the cashier so that we can borrow two buggies to cart our over-flowing purchases back to the Denali. I now am the proud new owner of the Winterberry collection of: cheese tray, deviled egg tray, ice cream bowls, water pitcher, cracker tray, candle holders and a chip-n-dip tray! SCORE!

5. Played Trivial Pursuit via Xbox on the way down and on the way up - I BEAT HARRY BOTH TIMES!


So, it wasn't New York, by any means, but, heck,my hubby tried and I give him kudos for that one! He even braved the early morning rush of the "Professionals" that swarmed upon Macy's like a locust, destroying everything in their path. I had half a mind to take my $10 off coupon that was clutched in my red-gloved paw and throw it into the air to see how many would jump for it. One woman had taken advantage of the $29.99 set of pink Leisure Luggage and was using it to haul around her purchases. She looked like a retail Nomad.

Babies were kicked out of their carriages so that mommy could use it as an impromptu shopping cart. People forgot the idea of personal space and were walking so close behind us that I feared a small Asian Woman would be lodged between my butt cheeks as I neared checkout. Small children were being used as pack mules in Best Buy, forced to bare the weight of a tower of dvd's, a light saber, and Season Two of Arrested Development while Daddy patted his $99 dvd/tv combo lovingly. Christmas music accosted our ears and made us both have flashbacks to our days of yore when retail sales ruled our busy lives and the holidays were something to dread. To combat this fear I insisted on listening to XM channel 23 - the Holly station.

And singing along with every song.


I think it helped.


Happy Holly-days!

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