Pearl Necklaces, for example

One day a few weeks ago I went to Gabe's due to the fact that someone who dresses not unlike a forty-year old DAR woman told me that there were some cute designer shoes on the racks.   For some reason I took her lead and headed to the store.  Packed with the rejected items of the discount stores and smelling like feet, Gabe's is a place where most retailers sent their crap.
For the seasoned shopper it can be a treasure trove.
For the mildly interested after-work browser, it can be hell.
So imagine my surprise when I found a cute pair of espadrilles and later, a book entitled:  "The Contemporary Dictionary of Sexual Euphemisms."
For a buck.
So I grabbed it and walked up the counter with my prizes.
I expected something hilarious and a book that would help me with my "smut" writing.   I mean, really, how many times can one not use the word "penis" before things just start getting silly?
Imagine my surprise when I opened the pages to find a rather dry and unfunny account of such things as "Little Dutch Boy" and "Red Riding Hood" and "pearl necklace" and "paddle the pickle." 

However, even if the book was not as funny as I expected and really wanted it to be - I can say that I'm much better educated on sexual euphemisms.

Anyone out there wanna guess what  a "Blind Houdini" is?
HA!