After a particularly torturous evening of walking the aisles of Wal-mart (a horrible task that no one who hasn't committed a heinous crime should ever have to do) Harry and I turned our buggy into the check-out aisle.
I noticed that the "impulse buys" that lined the aisle had changed slightly. Along with the candy bars, Bic lighters, gift cards and cookies, one can now buy antiseptic hand cleaner and KY lotion. That's right. You can clean your hands and get right down to bidness all by shopping at your local Wal-mart.
To my left was a wall of candy.
I grabbed a green box off the shelf and thrust it toward Harry's shiny one. "Look at this!" I yelled while shaking the box in his face.
"This is gross! What were they thinking?!"
"I dunno..." Harry ignored me while continuing to pile our groceries on to the dirty black conveyor belt.
"It's gum! It's gum with a <gag!> chocolate center!!! Are they trying to out-gross each other?!" I looked back at the box with the bursting chocolate center and wondered at the horrors of the flavor combo it held.
"That's just - wrong..."
"Yeah," Harry agreed while he continued to single-handedly empty our filled-to-capacity buggy.
I put back the green box and then dug around in my Kate Spade purse until I found my pack of gum. I needed to get the chocolate-mint gum flavor taste out of my head.
So I chewed some Orbitz Bubble mint. Which tastes not unlike Pepto-bismol.