Thursday, October 27, 2005

READ THIS OR MY HUBBY WILL EAT YOU LIKE A PLAIN CHICKEN SANDWICH SMOTHERED WITH KETHCUP!!!

Tidbits ....

( I started this awhile back - so some "bits" of the "tids" may be slightly outdated - but they were too funny to rewrite - so you get it all!  Enjoy!)  


1. Must start with a story that was recounted to me last night by my dear bud, Stacey.  Seems that her puppy, Oz, decided that it would be fun to mess with Stacey's mind a bit.  Somehow prior to their twenty minute walk around the neighborhood, Oz affixed a sticker to Stacey's butt.  When they got back home, she found it (her roommate pointed it out) and read it :"Squeeze me, I Squeak." 

2.  I went to lunch today with two other people.  I was the only female.  I was the only one NOT wearing pink underwear.

3.  I somehow got stuck in the middle of a conversation comparing pretzel sticks and male genitalia size.  I was slightly curious, mildly appalled and a tad hungry when the discussion ended. 

4.  I had macaroni-and-cheese for breakfast yesterday.  And today.

5.  I smelled the expired milk today - twice.  Embarressed to admit that I contemplated the "How Expired is it?" question a few minutes too long.

6.  Took home a stack of fashion magazines the size of a small fort home yesterday from work.  None of them were over two months old.

7.  Am supposed to be working at the current moment.

8.  Got addicted to Rainbow flavored Nerds in June.  Kicked the habit ... by August.

9.  I once killed two large houseplants just to watch them die. 

10.  Put pink lipgloss on my kitty yesterday because she seemed to enjoy it and got in the way during a makeover frenzy among friends.

11.  Love to work Impossipuzzles - no edges, no distinct pattern and five extra peices that fit nowhere.  It's a challenge - and it's name is "Cows in Boots." 

12.  I hate to clean. 

13.  Would eat pizza every day, if allowed.

14.  Have an unhealthy obsession with all things Harry Potter.  Bought a "mischief managed" tee and have been too embarrassed to don it in public.

15.  Hate all things natural:  bugs, trees, dirt, non regulated temperature, hair color. :)

16.  Have an older sister - who looks younger.  How fair is that?

17.  Would paint murals on every surface in the house if hubby would let me.

18.  Am never temperate.  Hate the heat, hate the cold.  I'm bi-polar - but - ya know - not in crazy way.

19.  Currently am reading anything I can get my hands on by Mary Janice Davidson - her characters are snarky and speak like "real" people.  I didn't know you were even allowed to write like that.  Plus, her love scenes pull no punches.  They are so steamy, they practically wrinkle the pages.

20.  I keep a black and white picture of my niece at my desk in an ornate gold frame.

21.  Went to Border's the other day and let him browse through books and magazines.  Then I took him to Kaybee's and he picked out a toy car.  THEN we went for milkshakes at Sonic.  I was  baby-sitting.... my dad.

22.  I really do think that there are things in my closet and under my bed ready to eat me if I turn out all the lights when I'm home alone.  Not my fault, really.  Grew up on the Corner of Elm Street.

23.  Managed to squash a brand new pair of expensive Oakley sunglasses with my ginormous rear-end.  It was Harry's fault... somehow.  :)

24.  Was singing the oh-so-catchy xmas tune :  "I Wanna Hippopotamus for Christmas," when Harry decided to be cute and join in - only he changed it to "I Wanna Hollypotamus for Christmas."  I sat in the floor and cried until I laughed.

25.  Was once carded at an "R" rated movie - I was 21.  The only "of age" one in a group of younglins.  My curse will be a blessing when I'm 40.

26.  Played Harry Potter Scene It with Harry the other day.  Was going to mercilessly whip his cute butt like I did when I put the smack down during Family Guy Uno (Blast you vile hubby!  Wild Card!) - but he beat me - twice in a row.

 27.  Am still supposed to be "working."

28.  Can only sleep if someone is in the bed with me.  Rather that be man, sister, or furball is not of my concern.

29.  One of my boss' think that an appropriate morning greeting is :  "mint, please"  followed by a hand gesture of receiving.  To this day - have refrained from giving him a hand gesture of my own.

30.  My elbows are so dry right now- they're bright red.  With the rest of me being so pale, am worried of being recruited to guide a sleigh.

31.  Contemplated buying the  Billy Blanks Contact Bag in which one kicks and punches their way toa healthier bod.  Worried that I would confuse it with a Buffy episode and just watch it with a tub of popcorn.  So I passed.  Crisis averted.

32.  My  hubby can go out, buy me an outfit head-to-toe - and - miraculously - it will fit. I could do the same - and it would look awful, and make me look like a stuffed sausage.

33.  I have no clue how to change a tire.  Luckily, I married into AAA.

34.    I saw the movie "SKY HIGH."  Loved it.

35.  To this day, there are times when I still break into songs from the movie "Newsies."  What a film phenomenon that was.  Sigh.  Christian Bale, whether in a bat suit or a newsboy cap - delectable!

36.  Once, to my utmost horror, used the incorrect version of "your."    

 

--- and that concludes our Feature Presentation of "What I Always Knew About Holly but Was Too Afraid To Ask." :)

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

thanks for stopping by my journal...yours is too funny.  I love it.  I did put a hair tie on the back of my dogs tail yesterday..it was completely funny.  He never missed a beat...really.  They hair tie is covered with little bells...I guess I should mention he sounded like a little elf.  Now there gone...??? Kinda of a scary thought. Have a great weekend.
Dwana