But after three days of taking care of a baby who is more snot than substance most of the time - I need a break.
Even if it's just a few minutes to pop online, see what celebrity nipple-slipped today and what's new in the old world of Harry Potter.
And when he gets like this?
This crazy "nothing-you-do-pleases-me-vile-woman-so-watch-as-I-cry-until-I-can't-breathe" baby who should love me for giving him life but instead seems his damnedest to make ME cry until I can't breathe?
I can't deal with it.
I've read books, forums, asked the doctor and even posted things on facebook akin to "HOLY CRAP MY BABY IS UUUUUUUP MY BUUUUUUUTT - SEND HELP!" but nothing works. He has separation anxiety when he feels good - but when he feels bad? Oh holy schnikies look out. He reminds me of any green, dripping "monster" that the Scooby Gang encountered.
And at any moment I expect him to rip off his mask and reveal my sweet, darling boy that I have come to know and love .
So until he's unmasked - I will plop him in the floor, wish I had a maid to clean said floor, and continue to toss puzzles and toys at him until nap time.
Which I am counting down to like a freakin' shuttle launch.
T-minus 35 minutes and counting!!!!