Tuesday, May 31, 2011

A Blog in Which I Overuse the Word "Ass"

"We're really assholes, aren't we?" My husband chuckled as he turned out of the parking lot of the "ghetto" Wal-mart (we have two here in Huntington, WV, within about five miles from each other. And, yes, we have gone to both on the same night before.).
"No!" I proclaimed and sat up straighter in the passenger seat of our mini van that we swore we'd never buy.
"Yeah, we are. But it's okay."
"No," I continued. "We just don't like it when people say things or do things that are impolite or make us feel bad so, ya know, we get pissy and stuff."
He paused, looked at me and then said: "No, we're assholes."

Funny thing is - he may be right. How can one really tell if they're the ass in the room? Is it the same theory as the sucker one? "Look around the room and if you can't spot the sucker - you're it?"
I think so.
But the thing is - we're not usually this bristly. Only since we became parents did our patience for things like bad parkers, doorway smokers and door slammers really start to wane. So, maybe it's not US who have become the Assholes - maybe the Assholes have just become more noticeable leading us to, of course, point out their assishness which then, in turn, makes us asses too?
Talk about your double-edged (ass) sword.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

You aren't an asshole. You are just very astute and assertive. Assiduous. Yes, that too. I must assist you by assembling an assortment of assassins* and assigning them some ass-kicking of the doorway smokers and door slammers before they assimilate us and we become assholes, too.
Your associate,
*Don't you just love that word: ASSASSins.