I slept when I want.
I ate when I want.
I went to the bathroom when I so pleased.
And I was content.
Then I had a baby.
And here was this little screaming monster/angel (depending upon his mood) who needed me to make sure he could eat when he wanted, poop when he wanted and sleep when he wanted.
And I oblige.
But tonight I was hoping for a miracle. I was praying for an easy bottle/cuddle/bed and off he would go into Dreamland. So, to say I was not paying attention when I was changing his diaper would be a gross understatement. Anyone who has ever faced the infant penis knows this - approach with caution - it's loaded. But I, in my stupor and lack of sleep, forgot.
So I lowered the diaper and - was super soaked.
He grabbed the new diaper from me and started giggling hysterical while twisting like a curly fry on an Arby's platter - and just as warm and greasy as one too!
And that, my dear friends, is how this Princess met her Pee.
Look for the next installment in this series: Whiney the Pooh, out soon!